Cleveland midge vs Aeon Flux

Charlize Theron Aeon Flux

On a warm Oct 5th day the Yankees were playing the Indians in Cleveland and the field was filled with midges, mosquito like bugs. Drawn to the bright lights of the field, the midges were there to mate and apparently cause the Yankee’s to lose. It was so bad that Derek Jeter swatted at the bugs from the 8th inning on (video above), including while he was at the batter’s box.

If you had TBS in HD you could see just how awful it was with bugs covering some players necks and arms. I saw the midges in all their high-definition glory and I suddenly had the realization that Charlize Theron’s outfit, specifically the one pictured right, finally had a purpose. It wasn’t just some crazed costume designer’s fetish fantasy come true, it actually was useful! Sure everything has to fall in to place for maximum usefulness: Professional baseball players at a surprisingly warm October playoff game next to a lake during midge mating season. When it happens, though, you’ll wish you had Charlize’s snazzy midge-defending outfit. Sure it has a few flaws, but nothing that a few more rolls of nylon can’t fix.

As much as I hate to say it, Aeon Flux, not all your outfits were dumb ideas.

Just most of them.